Bruce Springsteen and his E Street Band were beyond famous in the 1980′s, but a new interview with the group is revealing that even when they were at the top, they were all feeling pretty low. From band members feeling unnecessary to physical fights over how songs were written to Springsteen actually considering suicide, the band opened up to New Yorker Magazine for the first time about what life was really like as a rock star in the 80′s.

Among the most revealing moments in the interview was the fact that Springsteen became so suicidal in the early 80′s that his manager made him start seeing a therapist.

“He was feeling suicidal,” said Springsteen’s longtime friend Dave Marsh. “The depression wasn’t shocking, per se. He was on a rocket ride, from nothing to something, and now you are getting your ass kissed day and night. You might start to have some inner conflicts about your real self-worth.”

Many people close to the singer said they were surprised when Springsteen first started expressing the suicidal thoughts, but he claims his inner circle would be anything but surprised to hear about it now– He’s been seeing a therapist ever week since he first started his sessions in 1982, and has privately given millions to charities benefiting mental health organizations.

The rest of the interview hits shelves on August 1.